Friendship Blessing

We often take friendships for granted. We often assume that they know how we feel and that we need not contact them or even think to send them a small note.  Sometimes we get so caught up in our own lives that we forget the importance of a Friendship Blessing.


We know that true friendship is scarce but we also know that people are placed in our lives for so many different reasons. The reasons vary from friend to friend and a true friend is certainly a jewel to find. Sometimes you are given a friend that is there for you day in and day out, other times you are given friends that are around every now.  Other times you make new friends that take the place of friends that are long gone. In any case a Friendship Blessing is special and truly needed in your life.  I can't imagine not being blessed with friends of all types in my life. 


Within the past two days I have had a friend have an accident, thank God he was okay and walked away praising God for protecting him and I have had a friend pass away.  It surely has made me realize the importance of a friend and the role they play in our lives.   I was so saddened to hear of my friend's death & of course wished that I had that one last time to say I love you or it is good to have you as a friend.   Although we didn't talk constantly I knew of her strong presence not only in my life but in the lives of so many others.


It led me to the thought that friends are very important in our lives. It is important to be a friend as it is important to have a friend. I posted a quote on my FB page and it read as such " A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart!"  I truly believe that statement. A friend can be more to you at times than a family member.  They can be the ones that can put you right on track when you are off course.  They are the ones that you can count on not to judge you for the things you do apart or the things you do together.  A friend is sometimes there when your family has turned their back on you.  The physical presence of a friend is something special.  The Bible says "A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother" (Proverbs 18:24)

Sometimes friends hurt you as well, but because we have the truest of friends in Jesus we know the importance of forgiveness and how it can make a friendship flourish to greater heights.  We know that A wound is always painful, but it may be necessary to correct and so it should be appreciated especially when done in love. "Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses" (Proverbs 27:6)  A true friend is always interested in the ultimate and best interests of his friend, not just in temporary ease like the kiss can provide.


I just want to encourage you all to be a true friend. Don't just reach for their hand, truly reach for their heart and be true to each person you call friend. The blessing of friendship creates such a great feeling inside. To all I have called my friends & those who truly know me, know that when I say I am a friend I am friend until the end. In ALL times good or bad that friendship will always be there.  I didn't want another day to go by without expressing that to my friends, and you know exactly who you are.  I appreciate you and love each of you dearly. 


If you have a friend take a moment right now to confess your appreciation and love for that friendship, you just can't wait any longer, don't wait don't hesitate just do it. Be the true friend and reach out and touch a heart.

Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing!
Racquel

Life's Ups and Downs I am Resilient

How do you handle the ups and downs that life throws at you? Are you able to rise to the occasion at a moments notice? What types of circumstances do you have trouble coping with at times?


Life has a way of interrupting the best of plans.


We all have ups and downs. Sometimes it seems that there are more downs than there are ups. Sometimes it feels like the downs overtake the ups and it is hard to deal with them.  I know personally how I deal with it has changed a lot over the years. When I was younger, I'd panic when life threw me a downer. I would be upset and crazy and I would mentally scurry around my mind trying to figure out a way to "fix" it. That's not a bad idea but the down side of that is generating all this negative activity alongside it.  You know the questions, why is this happening to me? Why does it always happen to me? Why me? When will I have something good in my life?  Yada yada...

What I had to realize is the "bad" stuff eventually goes away, it always does. Something nice happens, something very positive and wonderful that wipes it out of the memory. It was hard for me to enjoy those times though, because I was always waiting for the other side of the floor to drop. I was in the mindset that good stuff never lasts, something bad is going to happen soon.  What a negative thought pattern. Of course more "bad" stuff is going to happen. That's just the way life is! Although I see it as "bad" at the time it really becomes "life lessons."

I can usually handle a crisis. Growing up, I learned how to put my feelings on hold so that I could function better and think a little more clearly. It's not that I don't have strong feelings about what's happened, it's just that I have to put them away until the worst of the crisis is over. What good is it going to do to get all up in an uproar? I mean who can really make a sensible decision in the midst of an emotional storm? Once it's over and I can release my feelings I usually have some kind of meltdown. Sometimes I sleep. Other times I feel sad or angry.  But the feelings are definitely brought to the surface to be dealt with.

Sometimes I get fed up and have trouble coping with merry-go-round problems. These are the same problems that come up over and over and over. It's clear what needs to be done but the solution is too difficult to implement. What I mean is, I used to want to be the problem solver for my family. I wanted to be the "hero" and I knew all the answers. Well, I knew I didn't but in dysfunctional families it's hard to break out of the stereotypical role.

As I have matured, I've changed the way I handle ups and downs and the wants to "fix" it all after years of negative rollercoaster rides. I pray, not only going down but coming back up as well. On the plummet down, I think,say and believe, "this too shall pass" and when I'm going up, I'm determined to enjoy it to the fullest and not worry about the next plunge.  I work hard to be resilient and resiliency works hard in me.  Ah good old "Resiliency." Resiliency is the ability to bounce back from the ups and downs of life. To be the rubber band that does not break.  To ride out the storm after it knocks you down.  To quickly get back up in a life full of whirlwind changes.

Daily, I am saying to myself, through life's ups and downs, I am resilient! I am Bouncing back from problems, negative things and just junk and stuff with more power and more smarts!  Nothing will ever get me & keep me down!  I have the POWER to keep going!

Racquel,

Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing!

Children running their parents

Since when is it ok for children to not only talk back but to curse out their parents?

I was watching a show where the child literally cursed out her mother. Her mother didn't give her a move gift so she decided to curse and throw a tantrum. Mom did nothing.

What type of craziness is that? I wish my child would think about cursing at me and throwing a tantrum. He would be picking up his teeth off the floor.

What type if adults are we raising? It has become the norm for children to run their parents. When will parents begin to step up and stop raising inadequate adults?

SMH we must do better parents.

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It is NOT just changing your FB profile

I know there is this great big push to change your FB profile to support ending violence against children.  I think that is great that we are bringing awareness to a problem in our communities.  But, more needs to be done.  When we change our FB page we must also educate in order to eradicate the ills of child abuse.  Violence in any form is never okay.  Children are helpless and they look to us for guidance.  We must not continue to allow the vicious cycle of child abuse to run rampant in our families.  Below you will find some information about child abuse and what we can do TOGETHER to rid our families of this nasty cycle of violence.  Please spread the word link to this blog.  Let's begin the education to prevent abuse and work to get those in violent situation to realize there is help out there.  


If you are a child that can see this blog and you are being abused, call 911 immediately. You do not have to be treated this way and it is not the way you should be treated.  Please seek help NOW.    If you can't reach a phone tell a friend, a family member and ask them for help.


Adults if you can see this blog and are caught up in the cycle of abuse you can get help NOW.  Don't allow your abuse to be the abuse to your children.  There are other ways to handle your child.  If you feel you are in a cycle of abuse please let someone know and allow your child to stay with other family members until you get the help you deserve and need.


Abuse is a neverending cycle if we don't start to do something we will lose more children to the hands of their abusers.


It is NOT just changing your FB profile.  We must begin to do something about the senseless violence.  Don't just change your FB profile Educate & Help someone that you know needs it!


Racquel 
Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing!


Facts About Child Abuse

• 84 percent of prison inmates were abused as children.
• One in three girls and one in five boys are sexually abused by an adult at some time during childhood. (Most sexual abusers are someone in the family or someone the child knows, not the proverbial stranger with a lollipop.)
• Families with four or more children have higher rates of abuse and neglect, especially if their living conditions are crowded or they live in isolated areas.
• More than 80 percent of abusers are a parent or someone close to a child. Child abuse is far more likely to occur in the child's home than in a day care center.
• One in thirteen kids with a parent on drugs is physically abused regularly. (Drug and alcohol abuse in the family makes child abuse about twice as likely.)
• One out of ten babies born today are born to mothers who are abusing drugs. Drinking and smoking heavily during pregnancy also endangers the health of unborn children.

Some Signs of Child Abuse

Child abuse is more than bruises and broken bones. While physical abuse might be the most visible sign, other types of abuse, such as emotional abuse or child neglect, also leave deep, long lasting scars. Some signs of child abuse are subtler than others. However, by learning common types of abuse and what you can do, you can make a huge difference in a child’s life. The earlier abused children get help, the greater chance they have to heal from their abuse and not perpetuate the cycle. Learn the signs and symptoms of child abuse and help break the cycle, finding out where to get help for the children and their caregivers.


Emotional 


A child who is apathetic (just doesn't care).
A child who suffers from depression.
A child who won't take part in play or school activities.
A child who is often hostile or aggressive.
A child with a loss of appetite.
A child who compulsively overeats


Neglect


Any of the signs above.
A child who is hungry much of the time.
A child wandering outdoors unsupervised.
A child unsuitably dressed for the weather.
A child who is continually dirty or wearing the same soiled clothes.
A child who shows up early or stays late at school.

Physical


Bruises or welts shaped like an object (belt buckle or electric cord).
Bruises in unusual places (back, eyes, mouth, buttocks, genital areas, thighs, calves).
Layers of different colored bruises in the same general area.
"Sock" or "glove" burns on feet or hands or doughnut shaped burns on buttocks (from forcing the child into hot water).
Small round burns from cigarettes.
Burns in the shape of an object (iron, fireplace tool, or heater).
Rope burns on ankles, wrists, or torso.
Adult sized bite marks.
Suspicious fractures (doctors and nurses are trained to recognize these).


Sexual


Withdrawal or anti-social attitude.
Refusal to undress for physical education or sports.
Exaggerated interest in sex or "acting out" sex with other children.
Unusually seductive behavior.
Fear of intimate contact (hugging or sports)
Torn, stained, or bloodied clothing.

How To Report Child Abuse


Anyone suspected that a child is being abused should report it to their state child abuse hotline or call the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline (1-800-4-A-CHILD).


Visiting a state's child abuse website will also help you learn about mandatory child abuse reporting laws that you may be subject to.


Also remember that if you think that a child is in immediate danger from child abuse or neglect, then you should call 911.


If you suspect a child is being abused, it’s critical to get them the help he or she needs. Reporting child abuse seems so official. Many people are reluctant to get involved in other families’ lives. Understanding some of the myths behind reporting may help put your mind at ease if you need to report child abuse:


I don’t want to interfere in someone else’s family. The effects of child abuse are lifelong, affecting future relationships, self-esteem, and sadly putting even more children at risk of abuse as the cycle continues. Help break the cycle of child abuse.


What if I break up someone’s home? The priority in child protective services is keeping children in the home. A child abuse report does not mean a child is automatically removed from the home - unless the child is clearly in danger. Support such as parenting classes, anger management or other resources may be offered first to parents if safe for the child.


They will know it was me who called. Reporting is anonymous. In most states, you do not have to give your name when you report child abuse. The child abuser cannot find out who made the report of child abuse.


It won’t make a difference what I have to say. If you have a gut feeling that something is wrong, it is better to be safe than sorry. Even if you don’t see the whole picture, others may have noticed as well, and a pattern can help identify child abuse that might have otherwise slipped through the cracks.

Ladies Straight Talk 11/28/10

This is a session of straight talk for the ladies.


Today I want to talk about women, children & baby daddies.
I know you are saying why?  but some things need to be said.


So I was watching a program where the baby's daddy was coming to see him for the first time.  Well when he walked up the mother immediately gave some serious attitude. Now mind you I don't know all that was going on in the relationship but IMMEDIATELY this woman had an attitude when he walked up.  So the baby daddy says what's wrong with you why you acting all brand new with this stink attitude.  Well she proceeds to continue to give mad tude, sucking her teeth acting all ignorant.


Now Ladies Straight Talk.... That attitude is Absolutely ridiculous!


When we are in a messed up situation with a man why is it the children have to suffer? Why do we act ignorant and cut the fool and give attitude to a man that comes to see his child? When will we as women leave that baggage at the bus station & move on? You know I see it all the time women angry for the man not being there physically, financially, mentally, emotionally then projecting that anger on the child and the relationship they need to have with their father. But Rocky you don't know what I have been through with this man. I say to that child I don't need to know because it is not about you and that man it is about that child.


It has become increasingly difficult  for men to be in their children's live because of the baggage that the woman brings.  We as women are so busy worrying about what the man has not done that we overlook what they are trying to do. We focus on our relationship with the man instead of the relationship that the child needs to have with his father.

Ladies Straight Talk, stop being a bag lady, you are stinking up the joint & it is not becoming of you. Stop hindering relationships for your children with your baggage and your issues. All men are not dogs and most men want to take care of their responsibilities, but they can't do it if you are always giving attitude and drama when they try.






It's Straight Talk, The TRUTH, Don't get mad cause I'm calling you out, put your big girl panties on take heed, listen and change!  Spread the word, don't let your sisters go down the wrong path!

I've Got Something To Say

I've got something to say but people always try to stifle me
I listen and I listen and I hear but people always want me to be what they want me to be
If I take the time to hear you and take the time to listen
Why is it that you always want to say something that causes strife,division & confusion...

I mean, I've got something to say if you would take a moment & hear
Why is it that my words hit your ears and disappear?
Is it my delivery or the things that I say?
I know sometimes I can be abrupt & forward which sometimes doesn't pay.

Well, I've got something to say please don't try and stop me
You can hear me now or just regret the words that you wouldn't let be
I don't want you to think that what I have is the only way
But take a moment to listen because I've got something to say

Lupus Education

It is so important to get the word out about Lupus.

It is such a hidden disease so when I am provided with an opportunity to educate & inform I am delighted to participate. As a guest on the Ananda Leeke Online Radio Show I enjoyed sharing a part of me with her audience.



Please listen  and share.

Listen to internet radio with Ananda Leeke Show on Blog Talk Radio