Children running their parents

Since when is it ok for children to not only talk back but to curse out their parents?

I was watching a show where the child literally cursed out her mother. Her mother didn't give her a move gift so she decided to curse and throw a tantrum. Mom did nothing.

What type of craziness is that? I wish my child would think about cursing at me and throwing a tantrum. He would be picking up his teeth off the floor.

What type if adults are we raising? It has become the norm for children to run their parents. When will parents begin to step up and stop raising inadequate adults?

SMH we must do better parents.

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It is NOT just changing your FB profile

I know there is this great big push to change your FB profile to support ending violence against children.  I think that is great that we are bringing awareness to a problem in our communities.  But, more needs to be done.  When we change our FB page we must also educate in order to eradicate the ills of child abuse.  Violence in any form is never okay.  Children are helpless and they look to us for guidance.  We must not continue to allow the vicious cycle of child abuse to run rampant in our families.  Below you will find some information about child abuse and what we can do TOGETHER to rid our families of this nasty cycle of violence.  Please spread the word link to this blog.  Let's begin the education to prevent abuse and work to get those in violent situation to realize there is help out there.  


If you are a child that can see this blog and you are being abused, call 911 immediately. You do not have to be treated this way and it is not the way you should be treated.  Please seek help NOW.    If you can't reach a phone tell a friend, a family member and ask them for help.


Adults if you can see this blog and are caught up in the cycle of abuse you can get help NOW.  Don't allow your abuse to be the abuse to your children.  There are other ways to handle your child.  If you feel you are in a cycle of abuse please let someone know and allow your child to stay with other family members until you get the help you deserve and need.


Abuse is a neverending cycle if we don't start to do something we will lose more children to the hands of their abusers.


It is NOT just changing your FB profile.  We must begin to do something about the senseless violence.  Don't just change your FB profile Educate & Help someone that you know needs it!


Racquel 
Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing!


Facts About Child Abuse

• 84 percent of prison inmates were abused as children.
• One in three girls and one in five boys are sexually abused by an adult at some time during childhood. (Most sexual abusers are someone in the family or someone the child knows, not the proverbial stranger with a lollipop.)
• Families with four or more children have higher rates of abuse and neglect, especially if their living conditions are crowded or they live in isolated areas.
• More than 80 percent of abusers are a parent or someone close to a child. Child abuse is far more likely to occur in the child's home than in a day care center.
• One in thirteen kids with a parent on drugs is physically abused regularly. (Drug and alcohol abuse in the family makes child abuse about twice as likely.)
• One out of ten babies born today are born to mothers who are abusing drugs. Drinking and smoking heavily during pregnancy also endangers the health of unborn children.

Some Signs of Child Abuse

Child abuse is more than bruises and broken bones. While physical abuse might be the most visible sign, other types of abuse, such as emotional abuse or child neglect, also leave deep, long lasting scars. Some signs of child abuse are subtler than others. However, by learning common types of abuse and what you can do, you can make a huge difference in a child’s life. The earlier abused children get help, the greater chance they have to heal from their abuse and not perpetuate the cycle. Learn the signs and symptoms of child abuse and help break the cycle, finding out where to get help for the children and their caregivers.


Emotional 


A child who is apathetic (just doesn't care).
A child who suffers from depression.
A child who won't take part in play or school activities.
A child who is often hostile or aggressive.
A child with a loss of appetite.
A child who compulsively overeats


Neglect


Any of the signs above.
A child who is hungry much of the time.
A child wandering outdoors unsupervised.
A child unsuitably dressed for the weather.
A child who is continually dirty or wearing the same soiled clothes.
A child who shows up early or stays late at school.

Physical


Bruises or welts shaped like an object (belt buckle or electric cord).
Bruises in unusual places (back, eyes, mouth, buttocks, genital areas, thighs, calves).
Layers of different colored bruises in the same general area.
"Sock" or "glove" burns on feet or hands or doughnut shaped burns on buttocks (from forcing the child into hot water).
Small round burns from cigarettes.
Burns in the shape of an object (iron, fireplace tool, or heater).
Rope burns on ankles, wrists, or torso.
Adult sized bite marks.
Suspicious fractures (doctors and nurses are trained to recognize these).


Sexual


Withdrawal or anti-social attitude.
Refusal to undress for physical education or sports.
Exaggerated interest in sex or "acting out" sex with other children.
Unusually seductive behavior.
Fear of intimate contact (hugging or sports)
Torn, stained, or bloodied clothing.

How To Report Child Abuse


Anyone suspected that a child is being abused should report it to their state child abuse hotline or call the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline (1-800-4-A-CHILD).


Visiting a state's child abuse website will also help you learn about mandatory child abuse reporting laws that you may be subject to.


Also remember that if you think that a child is in immediate danger from child abuse or neglect, then you should call 911.


If you suspect a child is being abused, it’s critical to get them the help he or she needs. Reporting child abuse seems so official. Many people are reluctant to get involved in other families’ lives. Understanding some of the myths behind reporting may help put your mind at ease if you need to report child abuse:


I don’t want to interfere in someone else’s family. The effects of child abuse are lifelong, affecting future relationships, self-esteem, and sadly putting even more children at risk of abuse as the cycle continues. Help break the cycle of child abuse.


What if I break up someone’s home? The priority in child protective services is keeping children in the home. A child abuse report does not mean a child is automatically removed from the home - unless the child is clearly in danger. Support such as parenting classes, anger management or other resources may be offered first to parents if safe for the child.


They will know it was me who called. Reporting is anonymous. In most states, you do not have to give your name when you report child abuse. The child abuser cannot find out who made the report of child abuse.


It won’t make a difference what I have to say. If you have a gut feeling that something is wrong, it is better to be safe than sorry. Even if you don’t see the whole picture, others may have noticed as well, and a pattern can help identify child abuse that might have otherwise slipped through the cracks.

Ladies Straight Talk 11/28/10

This is a session of straight talk for the ladies.


Today I want to talk about women, children & baby daddies.
I know you are saying why?  but some things need to be said.


So I was watching a program where the baby's daddy was coming to see him for the first time.  Well when he walked up the mother immediately gave some serious attitude. Now mind you I don't know all that was going on in the relationship but IMMEDIATELY this woman had an attitude when he walked up.  So the baby daddy says what's wrong with you why you acting all brand new with this stink attitude.  Well she proceeds to continue to give mad tude, sucking her teeth acting all ignorant.


Now Ladies Straight Talk.... That attitude is Absolutely ridiculous!


When we are in a messed up situation with a man why is it the children have to suffer? Why do we act ignorant and cut the fool and give attitude to a man that comes to see his child? When will we as women leave that baggage at the bus station & move on? You know I see it all the time women angry for the man not being there physically, financially, mentally, emotionally then projecting that anger on the child and the relationship they need to have with their father. But Rocky you don't know what I have been through with this man. I say to that child I don't need to know because it is not about you and that man it is about that child.


It has become increasingly difficult  for men to be in their children's live because of the baggage that the woman brings.  We as women are so busy worrying about what the man has not done that we overlook what they are trying to do. We focus on our relationship with the man instead of the relationship that the child needs to have with his father.

Ladies Straight Talk, stop being a bag lady, you are stinking up the joint & it is not becoming of you. Stop hindering relationships for your children with your baggage and your issues. All men are not dogs and most men want to take care of their responsibilities, but they can't do it if you are always giving attitude and drama when they try.






It's Straight Talk, The TRUTH, Don't get mad cause I'm calling you out, put your big girl panties on take heed, listen and change!  Spread the word, don't let your sisters go down the wrong path!

I've Got Something To Say

I've got something to say but people always try to stifle me
I listen and I listen and I hear but people always want me to be what they want me to be
If I take the time to hear you and take the time to listen
Why is it that you always want to say something that causes strife,division & confusion...

I mean, I've got something to say if you would take a moment & hear
Why is it that my words hit your ears and disappear?
Is it my delivery or the things that I say?
I know sometimes I can be abrupt & forward which sometimes doesn't pay.

Well, I've got something to say please don't try and stop me
You can hear me now or just regret the words that you wouldn't let be
I don't want you to think that what I have is the only way
But take a moment to listen because I've got something to say

Lupus Education

It is so important to get the word out about Lupus.

It is such a hidden disease so when I am provided with an opportunity to educate & inform I am delighted to participate. As a guest on the Ananda Leeke Online Radio Show I enjoyed sharing a part of me with her audience.



Please listen  and share.

Listen to internet radio with Ananda Leeke Show on Blog Talk Radio

Walkin' It OUT for DJ

Dear Family & Friends,


This year, I'll be taking part in JDRF's Walk to Cure Diabetes, along with one-half million other walkers across the country, as we try to reach our goal of raising $90 million. The Walkin' It OUT for DJ Team currently has 10 walkers joining us at the Walk on 09/19/2010. We are walking for Derrick, my son better known as DJ & we are so excited to be able to raise money for such and important cause in our lives. Type 1, or juvenile, diabetes, is a devastating disease that affects millions of people, a large and growing percentage of them children. We will be walking in Richmond, VA the details are listed below if you would like to join us.

JDRF Richmond, VA Walk information

■Date: September 19, 2010

■Time:Registration Begins @ 12:30 Walk Begins @ 2:00 pm

■Place: Dogwood Dell Circle @ Byrd Park Richmond, VA

Our team has raised $80.00, but we can still do better, millions of people with diabetes throughout the world are counting on us, including my very own son. If you haven't yet donated you can do so by visiting the link below. No donation is too small and each donation makes a difference. You can also donate your time by coming out & just walking with us to support DJ letting him know you are with him in this fight to live a normal healthy life in spite of this horrible disease.


http://walk.jdrf.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=extranet.personalpage&confirmid=87723616

Walk day is going to be great so don't miss out!

Thanks for all of your support!


Racquel

Cherish Each Moment

Hello World,

I have to say I just got back from vacation with my family and I had a ball.  We were able to hang out, have fun and just laugh and enjoy being around each other.  Something that many people do not do often.  I am so happy that I was able to be in the midst of my family in such a fun and relaxing atmosphere.  You have to love not the magic of Disney, but the Magic of the love of a family.  During each moment of my vacation I took the time to really take it all in and enjoy and cherish every moment.  It really made a difference for me during my vacation.

While on vacation I received news that a Sorority Sister of mine passed away. A woman who I spoke to just recently on her 70th birthday.  I recalled the conversation we had and was so happy that I was able to know her and speak with her on such a milestone birthday and all throughout the time I have been a member of Sigma Gamma Rho.  She discussed with me how happy she was to see this birthday and that she was so excited to be able to help others through the venue of our sorority.  We went on to discuss her getting some rest and really working hard to take care of herself. She told me stop trying to do it all and let others help me.  Then we talked about sorority issues and business that we had to get finished within the sorority.

Towards the end of the conversation we went back to just being happy for another day.  Soror Boyd-Stewart said to me you know we have to Cherish Each Day, Cherish Each Moment that we have and know that we have done something good for someone.  I quickly responded with a "yes Ma'am."  My Sister went on to proclaim her love for me and proceeded to say how proud she was of me and how much she was supporting me in my life and sorority endeavors.  She continued on to point out every strength I had in order to get things done in life. I sat and listened on my cell phone in the midst of people all around me and enjoyed the conversation and the love I was feeling from my Sister.  I felt proud to call her my sister & even prouder that she saw in me some things I couldn't really see in myself.  I couldn't say anything and when I didn't she stated to me, "that is why I love you, you take a moment to take it all in and marinate on each and every word. I love that you have listened & I know you know what I mean by cherishing every moment." I sat in awe of her words and finally mustered up enough courage to thank her for her words of encouragement & love.  I also thanked her for always being the strong woman she was and we ended our conversation with "Soror I love you stay well and cherish each moment."

Right now at this very moment my Soror, my Sister, my Friend is being Eulogized.  A this very moment I cherish the time I had with her, the conversations, the face to face together time, the straight to the point in my face "you better do such and such" moments. (Soror I know if you were in front of me you will smile at that statement LOL) I cherish that final conversation and feel so blessed to have had it with her.   What a great woman she was.  So loving and caring, in her own strong way, even when she didn't know it.  Her stern way of talking and her straight heads on stance on it all, surely told each person she was in contact with that you were loved.  I will miss you Soror Boyd-Stewart I know you will rest in peace in the arms of our loving God!  I sit and recall that conversation and Thank God that I Cherished that Moment like she instructed me to do!

Today, don't just go through  the day complaining and pointing out the negatives.  Take a moment to take it all  in and Cherish Each Moment to the fullest, no matter what your situation, know that tomorrow is surely not promised to any of us and each moment is a true testament of how important each relationship is and should be to each of us.

Take that time today to Cherish Each Moment, don't let one second pass without realizing the blessings big and small in your life.


Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be A Blessing!
Racquel

Look Better Naked

I am reading a book called "Look Better Naked" what an awesome read with great ideas to shape your body and get healthy.

I have to tell you I am on a mission to Look Better Naked.  When you think about it, as women, naked cuts into the core of our deepest insecurities.   Many women have a deep fear in showing their bodies.  They live a life covered up and overdressed because of their own body image & self esteem.  Body image affects how you feel about yourself. It's an important factor in self esteem for women, men, adolescents and children. The modern world glorifies the perfect body and if you're a woman it's difficult to be positive if you believe you are fat, ugly, too tall etc.

Self esteem in women these days seems dependant on how they think they look. Many women check the scales several times a day. They often say to themselves, "I'm fat, short, skinny" - these are opinions you hold that may not be true. We all know people who are fat and happy and others who are slim and unhappy. 

Guess what? Some men like large, some small, some thin and some tall. You don't have to be thin to be attractive! Someone will like your appearance just as you are and if you have a good feeling about yourself that's even better!

With a positive or healthy body image, a woman has a real perception of her size and shape. She also feels comfortable with her body. With a negative body image, a woman has a distorted perception of her shape and size, compares her body to others, and feels shame and anxiety about her body. Being unhappy with your body can affect how you think and feel about yourself as a person. A poor body image can lead to emotional distress, low self-esteem, unhealthy dieting habits, anxiety, depression, and eating disorders. Developing a positive body image and a healthy mental attitude is crucial to a woman's happiness and wellness.

We all want to look our best, but a healthy body is not always linked to outer appearance. In fact, healthy bodies come in all shapes and sizes! Changing your body image means changing the way you think about your body. At the same time, healthy lifestyle choices are also key to improving body image.

This book goes into so many different ways and levels of strengthening your body image.  Like Healthy eating can promote healthy skin and hair, along with strong bones. Regular exercise has been shown to boost self-esteem, self-image, and energy levels & Plenty of rest is key to stress management.

We as women have to stop shying away from the mirror. We need to stop the stinking thinking in our own skin.  It is time to get comfortable in the skin we are in and look better naked.  And don't forget your kids! The attitude of parents about appearance and diet affects their kids' attitudes. So be aware of that when you pick up this book.

"Look Better Naked is an invitation to stop hiding from yourself, to rediscover—and reshape—the body beneath your clothes, and to boost your in-the-buff confidence. The next time you’re about to step into the shower, take a look at your reflection in the mirror and stash the image in your memory bank. That’s the last you’re going to see of the old you. Then put aside the weight-loss and shape-up disappointments you’ve faced in the past and get ready to look better naked!"(Excerpt from Look Better Naked, by Michele Promaulayko. Get the six-week plan to your leanest, hottest body ever)

Your body is unique, enjoy it and love it. Focus on your good points. If someone likes you they will see the good and not the bad. Make yourself worthy of love and like yourself first. 

I AM ON A QUEST TO LOOK BETTER NAKED, YOU SHOULD JOIN ME!

Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing,

Racquel

Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

Stop Comparing Yourself to Others


We are all different yet we have a tendency to compare ourselves to others. It's human nature, and while learning from others is an important part of critical decision making, if it is used to reinforce an unrealistic or negative self-image it can be an unhealthy habit to get into.

Much like people, apples and oranges are part of the same family, but are so different that it's pointless to compare them.  To get out of that habit you must do a couple of things. 1. Recognize that comparing yourself to others is a bad habit. 2. Realize that everybody is different, because we are. & 3. Stop being afraid to be yourself.

When you use others as your measuring stick, you usually come up short. You convince yourself you’re not as clever, beautiful, thin or talented.


Equating yourself with others eats away at your confidence and leaves you feeling inferior.


Remind yourself of these simple truths. You are a unique and special person, exactly as you are. You’re one-of-a-kind and you’re irreplaceable.


It's better to be the original you than to be a copy of somebody else.


Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing
Racquel

Priceless Moments

If you have children you know when you put them to bed & kiss them goodnight they will find their way to your bed. You will hear the pitter patter of itty bitty feet and as you look up and try to adjust your eyes you will see that tiny shadow. Your child may be crying, or still trying to wake up themselves, but they are at the foot of the bed.

Whether it be from a nightmare, because they can't sleep, or something startled them awake and they need comfort or they just don't want to be alone. They will wander in your bed & snuggle in between you & your spouse & be fast asleep before you even realize they are there. The next thing you know it is morning and you have a child in your face asking what are we going to do today mom & dad :-)

Your children know that you will welcome them with open arms. They come to you for that protection, that comfort that love. They long to be close to the ones they love and they know we are going to reciprocate that unconditional love they so desperately need. We are their protectors & they want to be close to us always.

Isn't it awesome to be able to provide that protection, that comfort, that loving feeling? Yes children in our bed can be overwhelming & cause strain in a relationship if not handled well. To avoid that strain, make sure you are open minded to spicing up your love life by going elsewhere for your spousal loving feeling. Don't rule out having to go to the garage or the living room every now and again to ease the strain on your relationship. But that is a whole other conversation for a different blog.

Back to the babies, isn't that child snuggle time the best? To hear your child's every breath and feel their heartbeat next to yours and know that their love is so genuine and pure, is PRICELESS.

Cherish these days. I know I did. My son is 12 1/2, I have to put the half in there he would fuss if I didn't LOL, now and doesn't just pop up at night to say he is scared and jump in our bed. He doesn't cry at night to be picked up because he is lonely, hungry and/or needs his pamper changed. My son is way to big to snuggle and cuddle with in my bed without pushing me off of it. Oh, how you can miss those days of little feet in your back, a head butt in the middle of the night or a finger in your nose, LOL.

I feel so blessed to be able to have had that opportunity to experience that sort of love & need of a child. I love that it never ends only changes. So instead of the middle of the night bed runs, it's the middle of the day Mom I just need a hug run. A plop on my lap with a stinky teenage underarm in my face with a kiss on the head. Or a Mom will I be alright after finding out his life was changed by a life altering disease. Or a goodnight kiss with a Mom can we pray together before we go to sleep. Or a Mom you are the greatest statement. Those PRICELESS moments in time that gives you the want to just press pause and rewind over and over again.

No matter how it changes our children still look to us for protection, comfort and direction.

It is surely a blessing to be able to provide that. Every moment is a PRICELESS MOMENT make sure you take it in fully!

Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing

Racquel

Silence is GOLDEN

Somthing to think about....

We live in a world that supports a tennis-volley-approach to conversation: 'You say something, and quickly, I say something next.' This happens almost without pause or without us taking a breath. It happens with a husband and wife, a child & their parents & a boss & employee.

We are all guilty of formulating what we are going to say next, even before the person speaking stops sharing their thoughts. We are often so busy formulating responses that we neglect to really take the time and listen to what the person is saying. Most times we become inundated with our own thoughts, removing ourselves from having a listening ear,leading to banter back and forth.

What do you think would happen if we just said nothing? What if the words you did not speak were more powerful than the words you did speak? What if we all got comfortable with being still. If we weren't afraid of silence. How different would our lives be? Imagine taking the time to just stand and be still in the silence providing golden quiet moments that provide clarity & wisdom to last a lifetime.

Did you know that quiet moments provide the ideal environment for growth and insight? Silence is where some of our best growth happens and when some of our best insights appear that would have otherwise been missed during our chatter back and forth.

Without having to work very hard and by just settling into the silence, the quietness of the moment, you can suddenly leap into a new frame of mind.

Silence is Golden even the "silent words" you say to yourself. They are extremely powerful.

Today, Realize that Speech is Silver & Silence is Golden. Turn your silence into gold!

Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing!

Racquel

Ramblings of the Day

It has been a bit since I have posted to my blog, but I am home for the summer and watching some stupid crap on t.v.

So I am watching the Tyra show and she has these children on her show that abuse their parents. The children range from ages 8-16 and they are beating their parents down. The parents are sitting there saying how afraid and scared they are to sleep and be in the same room as their children. Talking about there are no laws that protect a parent from a child's abuse.

First of all WTH are you kidding me? The only law you need is the law of I'm gonna beat the crap out of you and deal with being in jail after I kill your behind. If my child ever came towards me to hit me I would punch him right in his chest and then break every dang on bone in his body. I have told my child if you ever raise a hand to hit me you better kill me because if you don't, be prepared to meet your maker.

This is a serious situation. The laws in states are giving children so much authority to do whatever they want in their parent's houses. I am all for following the laws of the land but I'll be damned if I birth you and you are going to try to beat me down. Hell to the NO! Why are our children so violent & ready to harm everyone that they feel does not respect them? In a parent child relationship you are not your child's friend, You are not your child's buddy you are the parent and it should be set as such in your house. It is sad to see the state of our children & even sadder to see the state of our parents. It starts from the cradle.

Let's talk about Beauty....

I read somewhere that Angelina Jolie is listed as the "Most Beautiful Person" in the World. Really? what makes her so beautiful? Because she has voluptuous lips & what people see as a nice body? That doesn't make a person beautiful. Although the initial look is pleasing to the eye what really makes a person beautiful?

Beauty goes way beyond skin and it is important that we begin to teach our children that although it is important to be neat and look decent we are not defined by our outer beauty. I am sure there are many other women out there that are just as beautiful if not more beautiful than Jolie, just overlooked because they don't fit the norm of what society says is beautiful.

Everyone is beautiful in their own way. Can't we just see people for the beauty within instead of judging them for what we see......

I don't know why I watch these dumb shows. What a waste of time, are they really helping people?

Peace & Hairgrease!

Mothers Day

As I awakened this morning I felt so blessed to be a mother. My day didn't start out in any other way than waking up and being greeted with...

DJ: " Good Morning Mom."
Me: "Good morning son how was your rest?"
DJ:"It was good, you feel ok Mom?"
Me: "Yes DJ I feel blessed this morning, how about you"
DJ: "I'm good, Mom can you bring me breakfast in bed? I am so tired."
Me: short pause... "Uh son it's mothers day can I get breakfast in bed?"
DJ: " I'm just messing with you mom, (evil chuckle) Breakfast is ready come downstairs"

There is no better way to start a day. Every morning I am greeted by a child that is not only smart as all get out but has the greatest personality and the best sense of humor. He constantly reminds me what a joy it is to be a mother. Sometimes he even acts like he is my little husband and it cracks me up because you really can feel all the love he exerts from his being.

I love being a mother, it is such a fulfilling feeling of love and affection that can make my hard day into a great day.

As this morning continues to progress and my family allows me time just to be me. I sit and reflect on my own life.

I think about my mother and the impact she left on my life in the short time that I had her with me. For those who do not know my mother passed away when I was 9 years old. In those 9 years of my life my mother taught me so much. She taught me how to be strong, how to love others, how to pray, how to be a real woman and a great mother. No matter what was going on with my mother's health she was always there for me and always loved me unconditionally. I now realize that my mother was the strongest woman I have ever known. She always continued on in prayer and love and that was enough to teach all of her 4 children how to carry on after she left her earthly form.

I often become a little sad knowing that my mother never was able to see me get married, was never able to meet her grandchild, then I realize she is always with me. She lives on in my heart and her spirit is always surrounding me guiding me to a life enriched with love. I wish I could touch her, feel her comb my hair, feel her kiss on my cheek, hear her voice say I love you...... What I would do to feel her hug....



This mothers day I have reflected on my mother and all that she has taught me. I have made it my business to make sure that I attempt to be as good a mother as my mother was.


Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be A Blessing!
Racquel

It's been a while...

It's been a while since I have had a moment to sit and really blog about what is on my mind. Please forgive me blogger, I will attempt to do better with speaking out about all things on my mind LOL.

Tonight I have some random thoughts about life, my feelings and other oddities. Feel free to chime in with your comments I always welcome the feedback.

Well if most of you haven't found out, my son was recently diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. WOWSER what a shocker it was. After feeling drained for about two weeks his sugar reached 811 by the time he was admitted to the hospital. What a blessing it is for a sound mind to recognize that my child was not well and needed to see a doctor. He was absolutely crushed as all of us were. It was a sure ordeal at the time. It was and still is a difficult pill to swallow. I just wanted to really take my child's place. I asked God to remove it from his body and put it in mine. I didn't want him to have this disease and then I began to blame myself. I began to wonder why him, why now, why not me.....

Well it has only been days that my son has been out of the hospital and boy what a strong little 12 year old he has been. From the way he speaks to the walk he walks he proves to me every minute of every day the true meaning of being a true child of God. That childlike faith is so strong and evident. He has his days, but for the most part he is just a great child with an awesome outlook on life & the love of God.

His courage and strength has led me to leave my own pity parties and go to the celebration of life soiree. He has helped me to put so many things in focus and I really thank him and love him for it. I now can say I don't say why him, why now, why not me. I say why thank you Lord for all that you have done and will continue to do within our lives. It is amazing what a child can teach you and how they can inspire you daily.

Ok moving ahead, b/c if my child reads this he is going to ask why am I telling all of his business on this blog. He may write a rebuttal too LOL


You know I was listening to a parent talk to their child the other day. It was the most horrible conversation I have ever heard. This parent was yelling at the child, pointing out every negative thing they could see. I felt like really saying something to the parent, but I really didn't have to b/c she saw my facial expression. If you know me, everything shows on my face. Well she looked at me and said, "you have no idea what this child has put me through." I simply looked at her and said, " You have no idea what you are putting your child through." It is a shame that people believe in constantly pointing out the negative in their children before even giving a pat on the back for the positive. It is so detrimental to children and eventually shapes what type of adult they become. If you are a parent, take the time to be patient with your child. Take the time to make sure your child knows you love them not only with your words but with your actions. Don't allow your children to be bombarded with the negatives of you. It isn't fair and it does the child no good. You will be amazed how far a bit of encouragement will do to a child.


That's really it on my random thoughts of the night.
Until I decide to return :-)


Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing,

Racquel

What you need to know

What you need to know is that Lupus is not a fun disease. Many don't even know what it is. So I am here to tell you what you need to know.

I come across people daily that think that Lupus is some "thing" or not a big deal or they won't have any idea what it is. Well I am here to tell you all what you really need to know. Since lupus is not easily diagnosed and not as well known like other diseases such as cancer or HIV, it often goes unnoticed and unknown. Let me give you some awareness, that I hope you will share with everyone you know. Lupus is a chronic, autoimmune disease that can damage any part of the body (skin, joints, and/or organs inside the body). Chronic means that the signs and symptoms tend to last longer than six weeks and often for many years. In lupus, something goes wrong with your immune system, which is the part of the body that fights off viruses, bacteria, and germs ("foreign invaders," like the flu). Normally our immune system produces proteins called antibodies that protect the body from these invaders. Autoimmune means your immune system cannot tell the difference between these foreign invaders and your body’s healthy tissues ("auto" means "self") and creates autoantibodies that attack and destroy healthy tissue. These autoantibodies cause inflammation, pain, and damage in various parts of the body.

• Lupus is also a disease of flares (the symptoms worsen and you feel ill) and remissions (the symptoms improve and you feel better). Lupus can range from mild to life-threatening and should always be treated by a doctor. With good medical care, most people with lupus can lead a full life.
• Lupus is not contagious, not even through sexual contact. You cannot "catch" lupus from someone or "give" lupus to someone.
• Lupus is not like or related to cancer. Cancer is a condition of malignant, abnormal tissues that grow rapidly and spread into surrounding tissues. Lupus is an autoimmune disease, as described above.
• Lupus is not like or related to HIV (Human Immune Deficiency Virus) or AIDS (Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome). In HIV or AIDS the immune system is underactive; in lupus, the immune system is overactive.
• Research estimates that at least 1.5 million Americans have lupus. The actual number may be higher; however, there have been no large-scale studies to show the actual number of people in the U.S. living with lupus.
• It is believed that 5 million people throughout the world have a form of lupus.
• Lupus strikes mostly women of childbearing age (15-44). However, men, children, and teenagers develop lupus, too.
• Women of color are 2-3 times more likely to develop lupus.
• People of all races and ethnic groups can develop lupus.
• More than 16,000 new cases of lupus are reported annually across the country.

I am here to tell you what you need to know. If you are a friend or family member of a person that has lupus your support is very much needed. Lupus is a very serious disease that can be fatal. It is not an easy disease to deal with. One day you can be feeling well the next day you can be unable to walk. Your body can literally turn on itself to the point where your vital organs cannot function properly. It is treated with drugs, but realize there has not been a specific lupus drug in over 50 years.

What you need to know is lupus can destroy a person's body, mind and soul. I beg that you make sure that you are not minimizing a person's pain because you are not well educated about this disease. If one does not have the support of family and friends it can really make it that more difficult for the lupus survivor to handle the disease. It is not a joke, there are people dying daily of this horrendous disease and those who are survivors are truly blessed to be able to tell their story and help another.

What you need to know is that a lupus survivor does not want to be treated differently, we don't want to be felt sorry for, we just want to be understood. When we can't get out of bed or when we can't walk as fast as we used to, when we don't sound or act like the person you once knew, when we sound tired, aggravated or upset, know that it is not you. It is the disease and if you could only understand that, life would be that much easier.

What you need to know is lupus is serious, as serious as any other disease you have heard of. There is no cure, you can't just change your eating habits and be ok or just take a supplement and be the epitome of health or just stop working and find tomorrow you are disease free. It is a life change that can be managed but is a struggle from day to day for every lupus survivor.

Today I ask that you take the time to really understand the disease and educate another.


Someone you know has lupus, it is me. Help me today by understanding & respecting me by educating your self and others about this disease.

Spread Lupus Awareness your way, Just Spread it TODAY!

If you have lupus, contact me today, let's keep our support uplifting and inspiring for one another.
Racquel
Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing
"I have lupus, lupus does NOT have me!"
http://www.lupusincolor.com

Dear Lupus

My dearest lupus,


It has not been that long since I have seen your face.I just want to say that you are getting on my last nerve. You are all up in my face right now and I really need my space.

So I am asking you politely to vacate my body before I get down right nasty.

Don't say a word just get to steppin!

Sincerely,
Me

Random Thoughts & Rants

Random Thoughts & Rants of the day

I have so many thoughts in my head so I thought I would share them. You can chime in at anytime, I surely won't mind :-)

Random Thought: Why are so many people counting down the days until President Obama is out of office? Like they are imprisoned in an Obama jail. Give me a break stop counting down and start helping out. It starts at home. Stop training your children to believe that a countdown will make it all better in their lives. Why not take a moment to pray that God work through the leadership to lead the country with wisdom, understanding and love. Start the countdown to the coming of Christ, because time is short. Do not countdown what you believe is the fall of a man. Just an FYI President Obama is a man like any other. He puts his pants on one leg at a time like all of us. He is not perfect and he is not free of fault. None of us are and we need to teach our children this. We will never have the "perfect" president. Just because a president does not do things the way you want to see them done does not mean that it will not be done. Just because someone believes in doing things differently does not mean that they are the one that will take something down. Off to another subject....

Directed Thought: Haiti... If you haven't donated, Please do, but make sure it is to a reputable corporation. So many will be out there to try and get rich off of others misfortune and pain so just make sure that you are sending your money to a place that will really give the money to the Haitian people. It is such a sad situation and if you are unable to send money please be sure to send up a prayer for Haiti. It was so reassuring to me to know that God is still in the midst of the Haitian people as they prayed and sang in unison in their time of need. Hallelujah

Rant: I can't stand people who think that everything has to be done their way or the highway. It drives me nuts. I guess sometimes I can be that way, well a lot of times. So at times I can't stand my own faults and pray daily for God to continue working on me.

Rant: Women just because it fits you don't have to wear it. You look like boo boo the clown walking around with a skirt too small and too tight. What is the point? I mean if you are looking for a man you won't find one that is thinking of you as a intelligent human being dressed like that. If it doesn't fit don't wear it.

Rant: Men stop wishing your woman is a Michelle Obama or a Laura Bush. She is who God made her to be and if she is your woman you need to be sure to let her know you love her for her. Don't keep comparing your boo to another. Be happy with what you have and always cherish your relationship with her. Couples be sure to realize that a relationship is a partnership and in a partnership communication is the key.

Rant: I wish these bill collectors would stop calling. I have blocked your numbers so if you are reading this stop. I already set up a plan to pay you now let the time come so I can pay you. Sheesh stop calling me every day asking if we are still on for the plan we set up. You aren't my friend I don't need to hear from you every day.

Lastly... Lupus I QUIT YOU, KICK ROCKS, I don't want anything to do with you anymore. You make me sick and I can't stand your ugly face. The next time I see you I am going to give you a flying kick dead in the teeth and bust out all of your fronts. So, be ready, if you plan on coming around anytime soon I am going to beat you senseless. Love Me!

Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Always Be a Blessing

Racquel

a.k.a

Mrs. Understood

“I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.”

What are your new year resolutions?

Resolutions for the New Year
By Yvona Fast

Most of us see the New Year as a time for change. It’s a time to set new goals and make new plans, to reflect on the past and look to the future. Consider these ideas a guide for making 2010 a healthier, happier year for yourself, your family, and your community.


Think Positively – Philippians 4:8 "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."


In 2010, I will have a more positive outlook. Have you ever spent a day with a truly negative person? Do you know someone who doesn’t like anything and complains about everything? Dwelling on the negative can lead to depression and an unbalanced view of life. On the other hand, cultivating a positive attitude can help us see joy in the little things. View the struggles and hardships life brings as challenges to produce personal growth and change.



Have Fun – Ecclesiastes 3 "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: ..."
In 2010, I will balance work, leisure, and spiritual activities.Do you come home from work unable to interact with the family? Are your evenings spent
with the TV rather than playing with the kids or sharing with your spouse?
As adults, we often become work-centered and lose sight of the importance of leisure activities. Play refreshes body and mind, enabling you to return to work and see life from a fresh perspective. There is a time to work, but we must also take time to play.




Fitness Counts! – 1 Corinthians 3:16 "Don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple and that God's Spirit lives in you?";

6:19 "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own;"

In 2010, I will begin and maintain an exercise program. Is your idea of sports and recreation watching a game on television? We now know that
regular exercise is essential to a healthy lifestyle. Exercise can also do wonders for the spirit. Relieve stress and reduce tension by exercising it away.

Chill Out – Phillipians 4:6 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."

In 2010, I will take time to relax and enjoy the simple things in life.As you walk, do you stop to smell the flowers? Or do thoughts and worries of work and family crowd in? Learn to turn off your nervous tension that drains your energy, resulting in exhaustion. Inability to deal with stress can use up nutrients, deplete the body’s strength, and leave the nervous system turned on.



Get Involved – Galatians 5:13 "You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love."

In 2010, I will become actively involved in ministry at my church and reach out to others in my community. Every Christian should be involved in some area of ministry in her local church. If you are not involved, contact your leaders. They will be happy to help you find a place of ministry in your church body. Everyone needs a ministry, instead of allowing a few to do everything. After finding your place of ministry in the church body, be a responsible citizen in the community. Once you create a positive lifestyle and improve the quality of life for your family, you will become aware of the needs of others. Jesus, our model, came to earth as a servant. By getting involved in your church, community, nation and world, you can make a difference. Use your skills to help those who are less fortunate. The opportunities are endless and are all around you. Seek them out and get involved!



This article originally appeared in the January/February 2003 issue of Woman’s Touch magazine. Reprinted with permission of the author.