LIVE BIG

I have being talking Live BIG for a couple of weeks now... Often people ask me what that means.  For me it means LIVE B.elieving I.n G.od! It is a statement that gets me through each day. We have not been placed on this earth to live small...or to Live S.eeking M.ore A.nd L.iving L.ess... We have been placed on earth to LIVE and to LOVE. So when I say LIVE BIG I am using the power of God within me to move forward in spite of how I feel and in spite of how lupus tries to dictate me to live.

“Being a mature being means living with a purpose, your own purpose: it’s about welcoming responsibility as the nourishment a big life needs: it’s about behaving as a good citizen – finding ways to add value to the community in which you live; it’s about wrestling with your weaknesses and developing heart, mind, and spirit – none of them properties of the spectator crowd.” ~John Taylor Gatto~

Living BIG doesn’t mean we strive for fame or fortune. It doesn’t mean we need to be the next American Idol or America's Next Top Model and be well known across the world. It simply means we live with a God given purpose and make a concerted effort to take real responsibility for achieving that purpose.

So with that, are you ready to LIVE BIG? Once you do watch how your life will change! 

LIVE BIG and Love On Purpose, Put on your living shoes and get to living!

Magnificent Me!

I am an excitable person who only understands life through excitablity..

I am thirsty for the marvelous in me and in others, mediocrity is not an option...

Only the astounding has power over me....

Anything that is not extraordinary, I must let go! 

I believe in intoxication of the phenomenal and spectacular and I never let the ordinary and mediocre shackle me...

I remove all walls and barriers and walk boldy and confidently in the magnificent me!

Domestic violence should not happen to anybody. Ever. Period. But it does - and when it does, there is help. Maybe you have lived with abuse, maybe it happened just once; maybe you work or live next to someone who is being abused right now. Don't take a backseat extend your hand to assist his/her life may depend on it.

Freedom’s Reign

The SLAP of your hand did NOT motivate me

It betrayed my trust in you and destroyed the ME I wanted to be!

Although you say you love me with all of your might,

Must I feel that might with constant physical fights?

Your knee in my chest, your hand around my throat

Should’ve been a sign to me that this relationship wouldn’t float.

The pain you cause me is unsuitable to my mind,

I become weak and disorganized unable to find….

Unable to find my way to complete overdue freedom

From you and the madness and overexposed mayhem.

Today I am here to let you know once and for all,

That I will no longer be your punching bag on the living room wall.

I stand before you strong and ever so tall.

With a preparedness to strike back and never again to fall.

You see right now I OWN YOU with the Strength of My GOD,

With the attitude to back it up and a mind racing like a hot rod.

No longer will I be a part of your agonizing bliss,

You must suffer alone now, never to be missed.

I can say I loved you, but your returned love hurt too bad.

I can no longer live my life in fear and anger feeling sorrowful and sad.

Now I must leave you to meet my FREEDOM WHO REIGNS

Away from you and the madness the constant hurt and pain.

Racquel Dozier

Copyright Ó 2000 “Roc’s Poetic Justice”

All rights Reserved

Choices....

We each have choices !!......


One reader sends me a message- ‘Is this all u do online?  Gosh you are 
always online... I can't go a day without one of your posts you post too much...’……….

I do try to post as much as I can in-between work, family, life and other things! I really like Facebook because it offers me an opportunity to really reach a lot of people about things I am passionate about like Lupus Awareness, Lupus Support, Love, Living a positive life and  making people laugh....


Supporting people is a very big part of my life and something which I 'choose' to dedicate as much of my time to as possible - both online and in person. It's what I do......It's what I love and is really what gets me moving from day to day....


I really am trying to support people and afford them an opportunity to laugh and get some things off their chest...and discuss some serious and fun things. But I understand my page is not for everyone. So with that....If you find my posts are too many for you or are not your style and they're filling your newsfeed you can either 'hide' my posts from showing on your page and visit my page as you like or 'unfriend' me and just visit my blog anytime at your leisure. 


I appreciate all of the support that is given and the love that is always shown by those who enjoy the things that I show on my page.


Have a GREAT day. {{{hugs}}}


Rocky

Love Jones Minute: Want to be Loved

We all want to be loved, to be happy. So why aren’t we? Because we’ve become experts at sabotaging our own happiness. Feeling like victims, when in fact it’s the choices we make, the bad habits, the vices, the inability to show love and compassion. These are the things that tear us down. We’re not victims. We’re assassins when it comes to love and happiness....


Every choice you make produces a consequence that is either positive or negative.  People say they are miserable YET they live life day to day and NEVER change it. Think about this, the ONLY one who can change is YOU. The unknown can be YOUR biggest blessing. Change YOUR mind, YOUR way of thinking, the people YOU surround yourself with, change YOUR surroundings, and maybe you'll find a BIG change in you.

Happiness is based on you and your actions. Stop assassinating your happiness and love.  Love doesn't demand to be loved back, but it doesn't mean it exists to be taken for granted either.....Remember happiness does not come as a result of something you receive but from recognizing all that you have. When you do this the want to be loved will be filled with love itself.


It's a Love Jones Minute
It only takes a minute to increase love awareness....


Racquel

Importance of Women & Friendships

I have just two women in my life who “get” me and I know would have my back in any circumstance and I theirs. There is nothing like it. I would not know what to do without these two great women and the strength they have given me in my worst times of need and have returned the favor, as well. These are the women who I want in my life. The women that show that sisterhood means so much more than blood lines!

In my life, friendships with women have been and are immensely valuable. Today, I am thinking on the importance of women’s friendships.

Throughout my life I have experienced the importance of having friendships with women. Talking,  laughing, growing stronger with each other... All very  important in your walk through life.  There are many studies that point to the health benefits of female friendships.

But you know female relationships are very difficult. We see this daily in our walk in life and even on social networks like facebook. I was thinking how sad it is when women resort to attacks in person and on social networks without really knowing the whole person or situation. Then I began to think in terms of women and how we interact. It has become such a problem for women just to get along without the ugliness coming out.

There was a point in my life where I didn't really trust many women. I didn't want to be bothered with them and their drama and nonsense. But life is different now. I am settled and content, and as I tune into my own gifts as a woman, I recognize those same gifts in other women. And, I am passionate about celebrating these gifts of sisterhood.

As I grew in me, I realized that jealousy is tacky. As I begin to celebrate the gifts of sisterhood I instead believe that we as women should admire each other's beauty and let it inspire us. Tearing each other down only shows others just how ugly a person you really are. It is  time to go out and celebrate how awesome you are by forming awesome connections with your female friends. Women we need to unite and make our relationships stronger. It's time to renew that bond with other women and make productive and loving sisterly connections.

We can not let ourselves become to busy to appreciate the encouragement, teaching, love and support that comes from relationships with other women. 

Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing
Racquel

In a Love Jones Minute.....

Too often, we attach our happiness to the choices of others.  When we put demands like this on our relationships, we give our power away. This is self defeating.

How many times have you heard yourself say things like, "I will be happy when he/she tells me they love me", "Once they commit to me I will  be happy", "I will be happy once he..." and the list can go on but you get the jest of what is being said....

Happiness is what you make it and it's within your control. You don't need a relationship to define it and in the end when you realize this you begin to maintain and draw healthier relationships to you. That doesn't mean you go around broadcasting I don't need no man or woman to define me... No that is not what is being said. But, you must realize with your Real Eyes that happiness comes from you being happy with yourself not someone else being happy or drawn to you.

Your attitude is the foundation of your relationships in your life. If you are content and in love with yourself, fulfillment will surely follow.  Remember happy relationships are all about attitude.

Change your relationship with yourself, love yourself wholly and the relationships around you will change too!

It's a Love Jones Minute
It only takes a minute to increase love awareness


Racquel

FB Wars, Just Nuts!

I was wondering last night if people say they are family,friends, associates, or whatever, why do they show so much hate on the next person if they dont know each other in real life? Why am I seeing more and more what I call FB wars? People trying to call people out on things they don't really know anything about or trying to tell people off "indiscreetly" when in person they never took the opportunity to even speak candidly to them? Is facebook becoming the new cowardly way to try and be the big man or woman on campus and get clout with hurtful words and assumptions?

I mean time and time again I see so many people just going off on folks on FB and they have no clue about the person or their lives. Yet they believe it is important to try and lay folks out and say their piece in the most rude and hateful manner. It's like it's a bunch of two year olds having temper tantrums.  I imagine when they go on these tirades they are falling out on the floor with their computer or their cell phone in a fit of rage crying and screaming. 

I mean is a person's life so bad that they resort to this type of communication to people they don't even know? Is a person so insecure that they allow something that is said on FB to put them in such a rage that they can't even communicate as an adult? It amazes me how people revert to being a 9 year old on the playground throwing sand at the ones they don't like or didn't do like they wanted them to do.

You know in life we have to learn to communicate effectively and not take the cowards way out and resort to posting to FB to get our point across. FB is a great tool to reconnect and spread your knowledge and expertise on subjects and meet new people. But it has become increasingly negative when folks resort to taking a problem they have with someone that they don't even know to the typing pad to make themselves feel good.

I guess people will be people and will do whatever makes them fell good about themselves. I just wish  that they would THINK before they TYPE and realize that there are no kudo points, no prizes, not getting from being the big bad FB keep it real only on FB type. I mean get it off of your chest while pounding your chest and showing your fangs never really works for adults, it doesn't even really work for children and that's why we teach them not to do it. 

I don't know maybe I'm the one that has it all wrong, I doubt it, but you know I always have to look at the entire picture. After looking at myself I have realized I'm pretty on point with this one. When situations like the "call out" is seen by me, I just have to shake my head and wonder where is that person hurting most? I wonder why their lives are so consumed with others that they can't focus enough to realize that FB is not the right route to take to talk to someone about an issue you may have with them.  Most time the tirades are way off of what the perception really is....I can't take part in the FB Wars. If someone has something they really need to get off their chest with me and they know me well enough to have my number I would prefer they call. If I answer cool if not that means I don't want to argue at that time LOL I am happy my life is in a place where I don't need to participate in the wars on FB. I'll stick to just blogging about them LOL
I just hope people realize that it's cowardly to take it to FB and try and hurt and call out people. In the end you harm yourself more than anything else.

Peace & Hairgrease Ya'll
Rocky

Love Resistance is Futile

Many women resist love. They are the caregivers, but they are afraid to be taken care of. They are so busy taking care of others that they neglect to accept the love that is given to them. Women often allow the resistance to hold them back from true love and intimacy.

Sometimes a woman wants to be timate, but she is held back by shame. Too often women are allowing shame to dictate what intimacy really is to them. They become fearful of intimate moments because of the shame and taboo carried with intimacy and love day to day.

Women, don't allow fear, shame and doubt to eat away at your self-esteem. Today, decide the course YOU want to take. Don’t always feel compelled to flow with the current wave of resistance.
Allow yourself to be loved and cared for and the love will flow in abundance to you.

Resistance is futile assimilate to the love that is waiting for you!

Show Me Your Light

When you walk in a room do you bring light with you? No not a flash light, the light of confidence & approachability? Can the people in the room tell when you have arrived or are you the one that brings the gloom? Your attitude reflects in your walk be confident in your walk and a room will brighten as you travel through it.

The world will step aside for a person with clearly defined objectives and a strong desire to attain them. When you are a person of definition and desire you walk a walk of confidence and conviction.  The talk is minimized and your actions begin to speak for you.

A person moving forward with conviction is fearless They move throughout their days with determination, not allowing fear, doubt or others stop them.  Your confidence and conviction shines brightly as you use every step of your day to walk to your true destination. You don't waste time waiting on the right conditions and you understand that there is no perfect time to reach your destination. You make it clear in your walk that the path is clearer as you move forward and not fall back. 

Step aside world, here I come! That's the attitude you should have when you walk your walk throughout each and every day. Make your light shine for all to see, brighten the path you walk from day to day! Show your light make it bright and make it clear!



Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing,
Racquel

Love Jones Minute

Love Jones minute....

My favourite Country Song is "It's always hard to kiss the lips at Night that has chewed my ASS out all day long". Ladies if you are complaining and yapping all day do you think your man wants to come home and kiss that dirty mouth? Men if you are bad mouthing and criticizing  your woman every minute, do you think she wants to kiss your filthy lips.... We must communicate and act better with one another. No one wants to be with anyon who is full of negative talk all day and trying to kiss them with yuck mouth....Clean it up and maybe, just maybe them lips will be ready for kissing....

This has been your Love Jones minute thought of the day!

Love Jones Word of the Day

The Love Jones Word of the Day:

Don't make excuses for a love that's not right for you. While you are steady trying to fit a round peg into a square hole the person has ACTUALLY got tired of YOU and moved on with their life. Stop trying to make romance with someone that is not looking for romance with you. If your description of them is full of “if onlys” it isn’t love. If you are waiting for them to DO something and yearning for them in your life when they have clearly stated they are not interested, it isn’t love. It’s obsession. Or perceived ownership...Or some other foolishness that is going to leave you brokenhearted or mad as hell when it doesn’t work out. Because it won’t. You can't drag a person to the top of your love mountain. They must be willing to climb and take the journey on their own. The point is: Live. Love yourself and stop trying to force another to love you. Don't guilt a person, stress a person or suffocate a person that is clearly not meant for you. Some people are not meant to be your lover they are meant to only be your friend. Know the difference!

The Storm is coming

So the storm is coming, you know it.. The meteorologist are tracking it and have predicted it is coming your way..... Usually, with the technology they are able to really see and track its progress and determine the wind speed and how much rain will come.  Sometimes they are right on track other times they are way off... So you will prepare and get all things in order to ride it out right? You get all the neccessities you fill your prescriptions, you get the water and the non-perishables in order to be prepared. As the storm is coming through your area you do everything to stay safe and make sure the family is straight. You play cards, if you have electricity you watch tv, you talk, you read and you hear the storm and tell your children it's ok the storm will pass over and we will be fine.  After the storm you tell your children see I told you everything was fine. The kids go outside and play you take inventory as to what still stands and what was tossed over. Those things that stand you thank God it is still standing and those things that were tossed and toppled over and broken you toss in the garbage.  You keep the things that are still good and toss the things that are of no more use to you. Then you move forward with your day and continue to live your life.

Well life works the same way.  Sometimes we can predict our storms other times we are way off like a regular meterorolgist.  Those storms we can predict come from the actions we took that we knew would create a storm and those that we can't are the things that happen in life.  When we go through one storm we learn and prepare for the next one.  We try to do everything safe and watch our P's and Q's and prepare our lives in accordance to the storm we have faced, hoping that we prepare well for the next storm to come.  While in our personal storms we still do the things in life to make the storm easier. We may go out with friends, play cards, sing songs, go to  church.  We even tell ourselves and our children that it will all be fine. After your storm you look at yourself and your family and say see that wasn't so bad we survived the storm of life and you begin to take inventory.  Through that storm you realize that life will throw so many storms your way and make the dust fly, make things topple over and even make you scared and shook up! But you thank God you survived and you also realize who's still by your side once everything settles and what matters the most! You keep those people in your life and discard those that were tossed about with the storm and pulled into the eye of it.

So when a storm rises in your life embrace it. When it is over, take the inventory and keep what's still standing and toss the rest to the garbage.  Remember, there is no perfect storm, things aren't always going to be ok. Sometimes all you can do is just breathe deep, smile to yourself, and let everything unfold and live beyond the storm. 




Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing,
Racquel

Baseball and Life!

Baseball is a lot like life. It's a day-to-day existence, full of ups and downs. You make the most of your opportunities in baseball as you do in life." --Ernie Harwell--

I obviously have baseball on my mind. I love the sport and I am my son's biggest fan as he works with his teammates to play such a great sport. Through the years I have had to explain to my son that baseball can be a very complex game or it can be really simple. When he was young I would explain that baseball is a physical game, where it is important to be in good shape, but more importantly in the game you have to know how your body is used. Throughout the years he learned from coaches that it's a mind game a battle of pure concentration and mental toughness.

I always gave my son life lessons and with baseball it is no different. Afterall in everything you do in life there is a lesson to be learned.  So I began to teach him in times when he needed it, how life was a lot like baseball the sport he loved to play day in and day out... I told him the following...

When my son would not be on task or lose focus not wanting to work with others, I would tell him life like baseball is a true team sport. It requires keen execution, knowledge of how to make things work like the hit-and-run play and paying attention to signals you are given by others. Individually in life, like baseball we can make a difference in the game but the game is usually won as a team. This provided him clarity in the importance of working together to achieve one goal.

When he didn't get what he wanted or when he felt defeated I would explain to him that we all get curve balls.  When he was diagnosed with Type I Diabetes, he saw that as a major curve ball but I explained to him when life throws you curve balls, you can never stop swinging the bat. You never know when you might hit a home run!  Of course he was like mom but this is my life not baseball it sucks being diagnosed with a this disease that can kill me.  I had to get creative, I explainded the importance of changing his mindset and how important it was for him to get some mental toughness in his life. I explained that life like baseball requires you to clear your mind, concentrate, use hand-eye coordination & display mental toughness.  Well he kind of got it as I saw the bright glimpse in his eys and we went further into the conversation.  I said to him in his life's field, like the baseball field he stands in left or center field all spring and most of the summer.  I stated as you fearlessly stand in front of a blazing batted ball and remember where to position yourself, what base to throw the ball to if you get it, and when to do it all takes some real concentration and mental toughness. At that point he got it. He said mom I get it. It was his aaahaa moment.

I began to tell him to remember just like baseball, in life you strike out go into slumps or dry spells & make errors at crucial moments some physical some mental.  Sometimes you look in the stands and there are people cheering other times there are people booing. But you still play the game you tune out the boos and work from the cheers and move to the plate to begin your trek around the bases of life. 

It is at that point that my son said mom I understand how it works now. He kind of put it in laymens terms for himself, he stated, " In baseball sometimes I hit it out the park other times I strike out but I still go back to the plate. When I am at the plate I hear nothing I am just concentrating on hitting the ball and getting on base. When on base I work hard to reach home so I can hit again. Mom you always say don't get upset just get 'em next time and life works the same way. We just have to keep stepping up to the plate and swinging the bat to get on base and move the game forward."    Hmph .... out of the mouths of babes...I couldn't have said it better myself....

Well my son with his great outlook on a sport and life is on his way to play in the State Championships in his age league bracket.  Not only am I confident that he will do well at the plate each and every time, I am understanding that as he steps to the plate he will have learned the sport and a life lesson at the same time. Learning never stops and I am so blessed that he gets that!

You know if we lived our life like baseball, every inning would provide an opportunity for us to start anew with a clean slate at the plate.  We get a new count and sometimes a new pitcher to pitch a ball to us. We sometimes hit it and we sometimes strike out.  The most important thing is that we swing the bat in an effort to make progression in the game.  In life, like baseball, we have to just keep on swinging. We have to realize if we don't get a hit, that we should still be satisfied to walk because the run scores just the same.

Baseball what a great sport not just to play but for true life lessons.


Racquel
Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing!

I've Learned....I Know.. So I Do...

I've learned many things in my life. I take all my lessons as stepping stones to a greater and more productive life.  I accept the fact that I am not perfect ,and that not everyone will love appreciate or approve of who or what I am. I look in the mirror daily and I make a promise to give myself the same unconditional love and support I give so freely to others.

I have stopped moving through life as a buyer, hungry for my next fix, a new dress, another pair of shoes or looks of approval and admiration from family, friends or even strangers who pass by. I have discovered that it is truly in giving that I receive, and that the joy and abundance I seek grows out of what I am constantly giving. I also recognize the importance of creating and contributing rather than obtaining and accumulating.

I give thanks for the simple things that I've been blessed with, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about.  I've learned to avoid toxic people and conversations and work to not discuss old issues and situations with family and friends.  I have stopped engaging in self-destructive behaviors, including participating in relationships that are dysfunctional. I am eating a balanced diet, drinking more water and exercising. Since I have learned that fatigue drains the spirit and creates doubt and fear, I give myself permission to rest. I know food is fuel for my body and laughter is fuel for my spirit so I make it a point to create time for play.

I know how to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving, and when to walk away. I know that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say, intentionally or unintentionally, and that everyone will not always come through... I have also learned and accepted that it's not always about me.  In life, I have stopped lashing out and pointing fingers or looking to place blame for things that were done to me or weren't done for me. I am learning to keep my ego in check and to acknowledge and redirect my destructive emotions it brings forth - anger, jealousy and resentment. I've learned that my EGO is really Easing God Out and that is not my goal in life.

I can now say "I was wrong" and I can forgive people for their own human deficiencies. I've learned to build bridges instead of walls and about the important healing power of love as it is expressed through a kind word, a warm smile or a friendly gesture. At the same time, I have eliminated any relationships that are hurtful or fail to uplift and edify me and others.

I have learned to look at people as they really are and not as I would want them to be, and I am careful not to project my neediness or insecurities onto my relationships with others. I have learned that I will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or important because of a man on my arm or the child that bears my name. I have learned that just as people grow and change, so does love and relationships. I have also learned that not everyone can always love you the way you would want them to.  I have learned what it means to love. So I've stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes.  I have discovered that the greatest and most fulfilling love I have ever known is self love and if I didn't love myself for who I am no one else could love me and I couldn't love the God that created me.

I know that life isn't always fair and I don't always get what I think I deserve, and I have stopped personalizing every loss or disappointment. I've learned to accept that sometimes bad things happen to good people and that these things are not a slight from God or a purposeful stab against me, but merely the way life goes.

I know that FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real and I've learned to step right into and through my fears, because to give into fear is to give away the right to live life on the terms that God has already set upon me. I know that to counteract my fears I must have faith. I've learned to trust in God's plan and go after what I want and not to squander my life living under a cloud of indecision or feelings of approaching doom and gloom that may never come.



I have learned to make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting and to stay open to every wonderful opportunity and exciting possibility put before me. I even take moments to look at the trees and bumblebees outside my window to remind myself what beauty there is in simplicity.

Finally I have learned that when God is for you and you keep Him first and by your side you can do anything and live your life fully without reservation or regrets.  I know a little about the Power of Prayer. I know in some of my darkest, most painful and frightening hours, I have prayed, not for the answers to my prayers or for material things, but for God to help me find the strength, confidence and courage to persevere and face each day and to do what I must do to honor Him through helping others.

I, without a doubt, know I am an expression of the almighty. The spirit of God resides within me and moves through me and I share that spirit daily with others. I have learned to open my heart and speak to that spirit and I know it always heals and empowers me.  God has never failed me and never will.

I've learned it all, I know it all has a purpose, So I do what needs to be done to live the life that is most productive for me.  Yep, I have learned and my life couldn't be any better after every lesson.

What have you learned? How do you share your lessons with others? Our lives are living testimonies to others.  Share your lessons and recognize your lessons help others in their classroom of life.

I've Learned.... I Know... So I Do!

Racquel
Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing!

Celebrate the 4th... Why?

Many have said to me, You are black why do you celebrate the independence of this country??? We were not free and were held as slaves and treated inhumanely ....

To that I say this....Knowledge is power & the past shapes the future. That knowledge of the past should definitely be looked at and discussed and seen for what it is. But, when you continue to live in that past by living in it in the present that is a problem.

Yes, I am a Black Woman, but I am an also an American. My ancestors helped to build this country, as a matter of fact it was built on their backs, and today I am blessed to have the liberties I have because of them. This is not just a "white" man's country, it is a country that is home to many who are different by sight but the same by being human beings!

Yes, I celebrate the Fourth of July, why? Because I have the FREEDOM to do so. Because my ancestors fought for me not to live the life they lived but to have the FREEDOM to live a life better than they ever had. I celebrate because my mind is no longer contained in thoughts of what was, but is now freed to thoughts of what is and what shall be.

We can no longer live in the past. We must learn about it, share those stories, see the lessons, share the lessons and use that past to push us forward to a brighter tomorrow. Too many are continuing to live in the past that their ancestors fought for them never to have to live through. Many are living enslaved in their mind spreading hate against a country they live in, but would never put their life on the line as their ancestors have done. It's time to reclaim minds and bring them to the present day. Stop reliving what our ancestors died for us never to relive.

Please know that realistically I know we as a country still have problems. In no way am I shunning those issues and sweeping them under the rug never to be looked at. That would be insane! I am saying we live in a free country and I celebrate that. We live in a country where we can come and go as we please and I celebrate that. We live in a country where we are able to look at the past and learn from it instead of being killed for learning. I celebrate that.

Let me be clear I am not celebrating the pain & hurt of the past. I am not condoning the what my ancestors went through. I am not condoning or celebrating what my people continue to go through day to day. I am celebrating that I have the Freedom to Fight any and all injustices I see today. I can't change the injustice of yesterday I can only fight for what I see Today. I ask those that say we shouldn't celebrate because of what our people went through, TODAY would you lay your life on the line for injustices like your ancestors did for you in order for your children to have better? Would you exercise that freedom TODAY? Instead of just talking would you take action? Or would you just sit and discuss and say why one shouldn't celebrate the FREEDOM we have TODAY to act and make a difference in our country? I often wonder if those who spit the knowledge, if they are really ready to take the action to make a real difference like their ancestors.

Yes, I celebrate Independence and I challenge all to use that independence to make a difference instead of attempting to hold others back in a past that our ancestors died for so we don't have to live it. Free your minds to the thought that this is your country just as much as it is any one else's. As you look at that flag and fireworks today know the Red is for the blood shed by each of your ancestors, the white is for their eyes that saw a better future for you and I and the blue is for the battles fought and won as we enjoy the liberties they have set for us.

This land is your land, this land is our land..... Once we believe this and see the sacrifices still being made we will see the reason to celebrate.

Peace and Blessings
Racquel

Things that make you say REALLY?

Some things just make you say Oh My Really?  These are things that throw you for a loop and put your mind in a tizzy.  


Like....

Why do people believe that if someone says I love you that that means I am IN love with you?  You know there is a difference. I can love you as a friend and love the things you are about that doesn't mean I am in love with you and want to be with you for the rest of my life.  Especially when you are in a place where your problems are overtaking you and you long for friendship that word love can be taken out of context to the upmpteenth degree.  It can keep you in a fantasy land thinking that someone is in love with you when in all essence they are just stating that they love you as a friend. Why would you continue to live in your own world taking everything out of context to fit your definition of love? A huge REALLY? As adults we should learn to differentiate the two and not get so lost in the love we need that we believe that the love that never was is ours. 

Sarah Palin.... Can we stop acting like this woman is really qualified to be president of the USA? I mean really a pretty face and a little sex appeal does not make you a good candidate to run the free country. Are we as a country so easily distracted by a "pretty" face that we overlook the real needs of the country.  This world is so sexualized that it is sickening. This woman can not even run her life effectively why would she be able to really lead a nation. C'mon people wake the hell up is this all we think our country is worth a face? Really? open your eyes and stop sensationalizing someone that can only tell you how to kill a bear and teach your children how to use the finger.  Really is that what we want for this country? Really.... Really? It's a sad shame that hate of one mane can move people to support and love someone that really has no goals, speaks of nothing substantial that they can bring to the table and is just a straight dimwit who is hoping their looks can push them forward. Really? WTH are people thinking.....

Beyonce's new video. What a piece of garbage. This ties directly into why are we allowing sex and looks to determine what is done in this world.... The video is about girls who run the world first girls can't run anything a woman can but girls can not. In the video all you see is Beyonce' and her croonies running around half naked.Wooing and shaking it all showing the men that girls run the world.....you never see a woman in a leadership role... hmmmm, Really? how do girls run the world then? That's the whole really about it...GIRLS don't! They run around half naked trying to use their wiles to woo men into doing things.  Women get an education and work hard to run the world and don't rely on the superficial to progress.  I mean really Beyonce' can we move from teaching our young girls this nonsense? We have enough issues with image as women and to continue to perpetuate that you must look a certain way way and half dress to get ahead is absolutely ridiculous. Really????? Get it together!

What Really gets me is people who have a "good word" for everything. I mean from the Bible. Now before you think oh Racquel is going to hell with that, you just don't know my heart and how God works through me, for me, in between me and in me so shut it! But I am talking about those people you say, "excuse me can you please pass the jelly.." and they reply..." You know in Galations 2:4  God said that false brothers infiltrated our ranks...." .........****REALLY?*** dude I just need the jelly to put on my muffin man how the bread infiltrated the ranks???? I mean everything does not require someone to spit out a Bible verse or tell me I will pray for you or we need to pray about it.   I love the Lord just as much as the next woman & I love reading the Bible it's the best book of life and indicator of what is to come and has been, but good gosh can you not Bible me to death. We don't have to make the passing of the jelly a sermon for me. Really can you just pass the jelly so I can eat my muffin????? Really I need the jelly.... Sheeesh


SMH it drives me crazy the way the world is it is really becoming a place where it is hazardous to be....

Let me end with this, because I can go on for days at a time.

Anyone who knows me knows I am very opinionated. Listen, just because I have an opinion and voice them doesn't mean I am hating on anyone or anything.  As a matter of fact I am not even judging what I am yapping about.  I am pretty fair in my thoughts but many misunderstand them for judgments and that is far from what they are.  They are my freakin' opinions. If you don't like them use the grocery store method take what you need and leave the rest on the shelf for someone else to enjoy.  If something I say hits that nerve... hmmm maybe it was just sent to my mind just for you. I know mostly I am preaching to the choir you don't have to tell me, but since it is my opinion I am going to voice it regardless and I encourage you to voice yours to me as well.  So save all the judgement on me about my opinions about something or someone else because I really don't live by your judgments or impressions of me.  In life I have realized that you must get things off of your chest. You can't always just go with the flow of it all and not give your opinions because of what someone else will think. Think what you want I am what I am, you either love me or hate me the in between will probably not work.

Peace & Hairgrease!
Racquel

Random Thoughts in My Head

Why do people try to solve personal issues over FB? I mean it is so much easier to deal with the issue head on in person so that the communication is clearly understood.  When you leave the issue physically and then try to put the issue on blast on FB that really doesn't solve the issue. It actually makes it just that more complicated because of how things are done.  I really don't understand why people believe that blasting people or situations out on FB will make them change or change the situation.  FB should not replace the full conversations that are required to keep any relationship strong.  Some people use FB to hide behind their masks and do others harm instead of socializing on a social network they use it to harm others or act a way they would never act in person.   They are two faced living one life on the net and a different one off of the net. But when you think about it are you really living on the net? In a sense you are you have your community of friends and you interact day to day almost like living a real life.  I don't know just a thought that popped into my head that I had to release.

You ever wonder why dogs chase their tails? If they catch it what are they going to do to it bite it off.  I have sat her for about 10 minutes watching my dumb dog go in circles trying to get her tail which is too short to really even catch.  And if she would just stop and think a little she would realize that if she sat a certain way she would be able to scratch that itch she has on her tail just right.  

So they are talking about the rapture happening tomorrow. Dang I didn't know we knew the time or the hour. Some of these religious freaks will do anything to get attention. I don't knock anyone's religion but gosh when you say dumb stuff and spread nonsense just for the hell of it I can't take it.   No one knows the day or the hour we know it WILL come and we may just be living in the last days. But to try and get people all in a panic based on your beliefs is just crazy. I read of a lady killing her son b/c she thought the world was coming to an end.  That is just crazy. I do know that no matter when  this ugly world of ours is gone and no more we all need to get right and do what is needed to be in His Glorious midst.

You ever wonder... You ever wonder what hair color they put on the driver's licenses of bald men? I mean do they put flesh tone?  or have you wondered why they put Braille on the drive through bank machines?  I mean are blind folks driving these days? Oh and If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? Is the audience the animals are we their broadway show every day?  Finally Why do banks charge you a "insufficient funds" fees on money they already know you don't have?  That's kind of stupid, wait no it's not as dumb as I thought that's how they make money of the money you don't already have SMH


One last thought what was Miss Alabama 1994 thinking by answering the question would you live forever and why with " I would like to live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were ever supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever." LOL In her defense she had a hearing impediment from the age of 18 months. Maybe she did not hear the full question. But, I thought about what she said today and was like hmmm she makes sense in some sort of crazy stupid way.  LOL Some things you just have to laugh at and pass the laugh on.  Laughter after all is great for the soul.


Well that's my randoms for the day I am sure more will come but I won't bore you any further.

Got Purpose?

What is your purpose in life?  My question to you is Got Purpose?


I believe that we were all sent here for a reason and that we all have significance in the world. I genuinely feel that we are all blessed with unique gifts. The expression of our gifts contributes to a cause greater than ourselves.


Personally these past few years have been eye opening for me. Since 2001 I have been in a whirlwind of a life. It has been times of sadness, love, anger, pain, happiness and so many other emotions that I can't even describe in words.  Throughout these years up until present day I had to determine what my real purpose was in life. I can't say that this was or is easy because it is still a work in progress. But, this work is more fulfilling than the life I was leading with little direction or thought to a purpose of my life.


Finally I had an "aha" moment... I had these questions running through my mind: What am I chasing after? Why am I chasing it? What is my purpose? Why was I put here?  Hmmm some questions that made me think and think I did. As I was thinking I vividly pictured the day of my funeral. I wondered what I wanted my eulogy to consist of? I wondered what my lifetime achievements would be? I wondered what would matter the most at the end of my life? And I wondered Is it what I am doing right NOW?


I started writing, which is the best outlet for me at all times. I also began listing all the things that are most important to me. I wrote down all the things I wanted to do. I re-visited my personal mission statement, yep I have a personal statement. Sometimes you have to run your life like a business and operate as such. I decided that whatever I commit to must align with my personal mission, my values and my goals. For every new opportunity that comes along, I would ask myself how it aligns with my goals. If anything did not align with where I wanted to be, then I would not pursue it or I would drop it.  I made this my way of living day to day.  My personal mission statement guided me that statement reads as such, "To Empower, motivate and inspire people to living happier and more fulfilled lives."   Simple to the point and something I truly live by.  If I can't empower, motivate, or inspire you through it I just won't be a part of it.  It really is just that simple in creating a purpose for your life. It has helped me to realize what is important and what is not important to fulfill the purpose in my life. 


Some people look at me and see what I want them to see. They have their own perceptions and run with them. That is just life and doesn't really matter to me as the perception that really matters is that of which I have of myself. As I said my purpose is to Empower, Motivate and Inspire..........so I want to share what made me make the decision to create a definite purpose in my life.

Writing or reviewing a mission statement changes you because it forces you to think through your priorities deeply, carefully, and to align your behaviour with your beliefs”

– Stephen Covey, ‘7 Habits of Highly Effective People’

A personal mission consists of 3 parts:

• What do I want to do?
• Who do I want to help?
• What is the result? What value will I create?

Steps to Creating Your Personal Mission Statement:

1. Do the exercise with the 15 questions above as quickly as you can.

2. List out actions words you connect with.

a. Example: educate, accomplish, empower, encourage, improve, help, give, guide, inspire, integrate, master, motivate, nurture, organize, produce, promote, travel, spread, share, satisfy, understand, teach, write, etc.

3. Based on your answers to the 15 questions. List everything and everyone that you believe you can help.

a. Example: People, creatures, organizations, causes, groups, environment, etc.

4. Identify your end goal. How will the ‘who’ from your above answer benefit from what you ‘do’?

5. Combine steps 2-4 into a sentence, or 2-3 sentences.

What is your purpose? What is your mission?  


Today, take a moment to take out a few sheets of loose paper and a pen, be honest and begin to write your personal mission statement, sit down and enjoy the moment and smile as you write. Find out what makes you smile, what makes you feel great about yourself, and who inspires you the most... Begin with those things and start writing out your personal mission statement to define your purpose in life.  


Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing,


Racquel 

Rant Before Bed

I tell ya women crack me up. I try to be nice I try to be understanding  but there are some women that i just can't take. You know the woman that likes to stir crap up and then walk away.... Or the woman that can dish it out but can receive it back.... or that woman that talks a good game but she is all bark and no bite.  The woman that is too sensitive and everything anyone ever says to her she gets offended.   Or the woman who has the self esteem so low that she loves a man more than she even loves herself.  Those women get on my last nerve. Now I know I am not perfect, I never claimed to be, but there are just certain things that I feel that women need not be and those are the things listed above.  I come across so many people day to day and I am seeing the women described above more and more each day. Not only is it in the women but I am seeing it in their children too. When will the vicious cycle of women filled with drama and nonsense end? I say it ends here! I can't put up with the drama of some women. It all comes out of insecurities. If someone says boo to you the wrong way they are not saying that to offend you.  We as women need to really lighten up and realize that everything that is said and done in person or on facebook or on the phone is not to give us a blow to the belly.  Sometimes it is just talk and discussion and is harmless and meaningless chatter to pass the time. Women get it together we don't always have to be at each others throats. We can have discussions and be in each others presence without attitude and assumptions about one another drinking a large glass of haterade.  SMH it is getting a little crazy. But I digress.... Maybe it's me... maybe I'm the one with the real problem when I want to see women just be friendly and not bring out the claws every 7 seconds.... Nah it's not me Ladies we must do better in our interactions not only with each other but with everyone in our lives. Everything is not a fight. It is going to hurt you in the end if you continue on this path of destructive attitudes and behaviors.......

Random thought... You ever have the feeling that someone is always watching you? No matter where you go there is always someone watching your actions? So many people, including myself, forget that the internet is so vast and can reach so many and that we are always being watched.  The internet has taken big brother watching you to a whole other level. Now it's big brother, sister, friend, coworker just chilling watching your life play through on the net.  Are we relying to much on this venue that we are losing focus on the real things in life? I know sometimes I do, sometimes I'd rather communicate via the net instead of the phone.  Sometimes I'd rather receive a text than a call. I know it's kind of sad that we get so caught up in this whole new technological age that we lose focus on what's important. I know I have to step back often to regroup and readjust.

Last thought.... I found it funny that a young man told me that I looked like I was 25. He actually made my day b/c he was so complimentary. I guess he was trying to rap to this old chick LOL. I told him he was very nice and then he said so what are you doing tonight.... errr uhhh little boy I am going to live. He proceeded to continue on how he was looking for a girlfriend. So at that point as he was putting my groceries in my car I had to stop him. Poor kid was young enough to be my child. But I thought it was still cute that he sucked  up his pride and tried to kick it LOL When he finished putting my groceries up I said you are a nice young man keep up the good work. He laughed as said well just b/c you are old enough to be my mom we still can't go out...I just laughed and go in my car. It cracked me up b/c these kids are getting really bold and hold nothing back. Kinda scared me b/c I know if the young men are like that the young women are too. So I have my radar up for the little fast ones trying to rap to my son. LOL But it's good to know that this 40+ woman can still hold a candle to a 20 something year old :-)

That's enough for the night, well late night. I know my thoughts are random you can read em and share em or you can just pass them by. Either way it is an outlet for me to empty the thoughts in my head so in the morning they won't bother you LOL

Nite all!

Mastering Your Emotions

Often our emotions get the best of us. Many are controlled by them, allowing themselves to fall into a pattern of speaking and acting out of emotions.

Today I have chosen to actively control each emotion that I feel today and not act and speak through them. I heard someone say, "When we allow our emotions to enter into our discussions over conflicting and differing opinions we cloud the issues and detract from the issues." This is so true often your anger, sadness, hurt feelings get the best of you and you begin to speak and act in the way of the emotion. Making your argument pretty much null and void. You could be making a valid point but it is so wound up in feelings that it makes your rational thought a thing of the past. When this happens you risk losing the respect of the person and you hand control over to them in the palm of your hands.

We have heard the expression, "wearing your heart on your sleeve".... well People who wear their heart on their sleeve do not hold back their emotions, for good or for bad. It is clear how they feel in each moment. This type of emotional outbursts can cause major problems in a person's life.

When situations and conflicts arise in your life take a moment to take a breath. Bite your tongue, I count to ten and sometimes say a prayer. State your position calmly and without the extra added pieces of your emotions. Everyone is not your hater and each person is not always out to get you. This is part of emotionally dealing with a situation. Remove those feelings and deal with the issue at hand.

Remember there is a time and place to show your emotions. We own our emotions! Take personal responsibility for the part you play while leading in a emotion filled way. We must be mature individuals and know the appropriate time, place and way to show our emotions. If we don't get control of our emotions, we are sure to stay in conflict and never be a part of the solution but continuously stay a part of the problem!


Be Blessed, Be Encouraged & Be a Blessing!

Racquel

The Big Spring Clean

Spring is such a beautiful time of year.  With all the rain and sun, things get greener everyday. You throw your windows up and allow the fresh air to to stir through your rooms.  Isn't it a great feeling to be in a bright room with a fresh breeze flowing through it? I mean it gives you a sense of new possibilities as the bitter cold of winter gets behind us for a while. During the spring season we always have the urge to begin cleaning. To freshen up, to try something new, to rearrange furniture or get all the clutter organized.


It's the same with our lives.  You know spring cleaning is not just for your home anymore!  After years of doing things the same way our lives can get musty & stale.Sometimes we need to throw light into dark corners and brighten up our perspectives.  Sometimes we need to rearrange some people in our lives or throw away activities that clutter our schedules. Other times we need to organize the rooms of our lives.

With spring comes a momentum.  We need to use that momentum to freshen up our lives and invite others to do the same. Today evaluate what is dusty and what could be refreshed in your life and feel the breeze of possibility move within you.  Remember Spring Cleaning is not just for the home it's important in our lives.








Racquel
"Be Blessed, Be Encouraged and Be a Blessing!"